Win a Free Copy of TinyBuddha's New Book: 365 Tiny Love Challenges!

As some of you know, I've written for TinyBuddha.com in the past. Lori (the founder, for those unfamiliar with the site) has always been kind and helpful, so when she reached out to spread the word about her new book I was more than happy.

It's a nice coincidence too, because nearly every day I get emails from readers about self-love or relationship difficulties. For that reason I thought many of you would find this book very helpful.

It's truly a universal issue which so many could use guidance on, and the daily challenge-oriented structure of the book's wisdom serves as an incredibly practical guide to bringing more love into one's life- both self-love and love between people.

Here's a little about the book:

Tiny Buddha’s 365 Tiny Love Challenges

by Lori Deschene

From the founder of the popular online community TinyBuddha.com comes a daily inspirational guide of simple and creative challenges to help you actively spread love to those around you.

Tiny Buddha’s 365 Tiny Love Challenges is a simple guide to help readers pursue happy, connected lives and bring greater love into the world.

Each week begins with an inspirational message written by members of the TinyBuddha.com online community, followed by seven days of short challenges that focus on self-love, giving and receiving love in relationships and friendships, and spreading love in the world, such as:

• Write a list of three things you appreciate about yourself and place it somewhere in your home where you’ll frequently see it throughout the day
• Compliment someone who serves you in some way (for example, a waiter, barista, or bus driver) on how well they do their job
• Keep an eye out for someone who looks sad—a friend, coworker, or even stranger—and say something that might make them laugh or smile.

By using the book each day throughout the year, readers will learn to develop closer bonds in relationships, let go of anger and bitterness, better understand themselves and their loved ones, and turn strangers into friends.

The people at Harper One have been gracious enough to offer a free giveaway copy of Lori's and TinyBuddha's new book. If you'd like to enter the giveaway for a chance to win a beautiful hard copy version of the book (I have a copy and it's very nice), just click the green button below and enter your email for a chance to win.

CLICK HERE to Enter the 365 Tiny Love Challenges Giveaway

The giveaway will last just 7 days, so make sure to jump in before it's over!

To pick up a copy of 365 Tiny Love Challenges, click here for the Amazon book page or go to TinyBuddha.com/love-book for more information.

How to Walk the Buddha's 8-Fold Path to True Peace and Happiness

I’ve found that people are often surprised to hear that Buddhism is really about finding happiness.

That the Buddha’s teachings aren’t about “everything is suffering” and rather are about showing you the path to transform suffering, uncover the truth, and realize true peace and happiness.

I shouldn’t be surprised though, my path wasn’t any different.

In college- what little college I did do- I majored in philosophy.

Being a naturally deep thinker and someone who had always been interested in studying life's deep questions, majoring in philosophy seemed like a no-brainer.

But, being that a degree in it would essentially amount to me living off ramen my entire life, some people didn’t quite understand my choice. But I didn’t much care about that, so I decided to take the plunge.

I knew very little about Eastern philosophy & spiritual traditions, but they greatly interested me nonetheless so I decided to take an Eastern Philosophy and Religion 101 class in my first (and only) year.

Unfortunately, I dropped out of college too early for me to be properly introduced to the beauty of the Buddha’s teachings (the class was very dull and the teacher knew very little about the actual teachings). This resulted in me spending the next 5 years with an unfortunate misunderstanding about Buddhism and the Buddha’s teachings.

What little knowledge I did acquire in the class resulted in me thinking that Buddhism was nihilistic. In other words, that Buddhism was essentially negative in its viewpoint and that the central idea was that everything was suffering and that we need to fully understand this to cope with life’s difficulties as best we can.

Luckily, there was still that ounce of me left that thought, “I really didn’t get a very good introduction to the topic, I’m sure I missed something”, or else I don’t think I would ever have had any interest in Buddhism or Eastern spirituality again.

5 years later, I was introduced to the Buddha’s teachings again, this time through the work of many venerable Buddhist (particularly Zen, at first) teachers who were adept at explaining Buddhist wisdom clearly and concisely.

Of everything that’s happened to me in my life, I feel most fortunate about that. If I hadn’t found Buddhism and the Buddha’s teachings, I know my life would be very different right now.

No matter who you are, the Buddha’s teachings resonate with a truth that strikes each of us closely because it has to do with the path each of us follows- the path to alleviating our suffering and realizing true and lasting peace and happiness.

For this reason, whether you’re religious, atheist, agnostic, or simply interested in bettering yourself, the Buddha’s teachings and his long 2,500-year lineage is something that can show you how to live more fully and freely.

_____________________________

Download How to Walk the Buddha's 8-Fold Path

Download a free PDF version of How to Walk the Buddha's 8-Fold Path to True Peace and Happiness and begin following the Buddha's path:

_____________________________

The Buddha’s 4 Truths

Before we get into the Buddha's 8-Fold Path, it’s important to cover the foundational teaching of all the Buddha’s teachings, and the teaching which the 8-Fold Path is included within- the Buddha's 4 Noble Truths.

The Buddha’s teachings can at first seem confusing and difficult to understand. Many Buddhist teachings have a lot of depth to them, but despite that the majority have a relatively simple and straightforward explanation.

The 4 Noble Truths can be explained simply as such, with a little extra explanation below each point:

1st Noble Truth: Identify suffering

The first Noble Truth is the identification of suffering. “Suffering is present”.

Use of the word suffering can be a bit confusing in English, where the word typically means some severe pain. When you properly understand the Buddhist use of the word suffering, though, it’s rather enlightening itself.

Suffering refers to a number of things such as what we feel when experiencing strong emotions, stress, and anxiety, but most notably it refers to the perpetual discontent we feel on an everyday basis (which you could call a subtler form of stress, in a way). It’s a basic lack of fulfillment- a lack of peace which can originate from a number of sources.

2nd Noble Truth: Identify the path to suffering

This is all about identifying what’s causing your suffering. Before you know exactly why you suffer, it's very difficult to be able to anything about your situation. Therefore, this step is about getting to the source of your suffering so that you can cut it off from the root.

Everyone suffers somewhat differently, so identifying our own suffering and the various intentional actions which are causing our suffering can be a very personal journey.

3rd Noble Truth: Identify well-being

The 3rd Noble Truth is like the first, but it’s about identifying the existence of well-being, or happiness (well-being is a generally more complete term when compared to happiness, but it includes it depending on how you define the word).

4th Noble Truth: Identify the path to well-being

Like the 3rd Noble Truth compared to the 1st, the 4th Noble Truth is similar to the 2nd but here it’s the path out, the path to well-being that’s being identified.

This step is about acknowledging the way out of suffering, the way to true peace and happiness- the entire point in the first place.

From the 1st Noble Truth on, a practitioner on the Noble path is working to identify and deeply understand their suffering, see how that suffering is being caused so that they can change those behaviors, identifying the source of well-being (the way to alleviate suffering), and working to understand how well-being is caused so that they can follow the path to alleviate their suffering by creating well-being.

When the 4 Noble Truths are broken down simply, they provide a straightforward path to discovering true peace and happiness in this life, through the very challenges and difficulties (your suffering) that you experience.

This, to me, is invaluable wisdom because it applies to all people, in every situation, and at all stages of life.

But what is the path to well-being? Isn’t that what everyone wants to know? Understanding our suffering is very important. In fact, understanding it deeply (it’s existence itself, even) is required to realizing true peace and happiness.

But the path to true peace and happiness as laid out by the Buddha over 2,500 years ago is just as important, and that’s included within the 4th Noble Truth. That path is the Buddha's 8-Fold Path.

How to Walk the Buddha's 8-Fold Path to True Peace and Happiness

Along with the 4 Noble Truths, the Buddha’s 8-Fold Path is the second of the two foundational Buddhist teachings.

There’s a lot of talk about the components of happiness, or well-being, nowadays. I find the 8-fold path both interesting and profound because it’s in many ways that, and it was established over 2500 years ago by the Buddha.

An easy way to understand the different schools of Buddhism is through the 8-Fold Path. It’s in the 8-Fold Path that is truly where the different schools differ because the 8-Fold Path is very much a blueprint for Buddhist practice.

How do they differ? All schools of Buddhism practice each fold on the path, but certain schools emphasize certain groups more than others.

Zen, for instance, emphasizes Right Mindfulness, Right Concentration, and Right Effort because the practice of Zen emphasizes the practice itself (of meditation and living with mindfulness).

Keep in mind a few things before we get into each path:

1. The 8-Fold Path isn’t a set of sequential steps. The 8-Fold Path is more of a web of interrelated efforts to focus on together as one body.

As I’ll point out repeatedly throughout my explanation of each part of the path, they all bleed into each other in countless ways.

2. Right means the right way to do that specific act conducive to cultivating liberation from suffering and true peace and happiness (or well-being). The word “Right” follows all 8 parts of the path. This is because what the 8-fold path entails is essentially 8 different “actions” of sorts, many of which you already do every day, which can be done in a way that they’re not conducive to well-being (which is something that can be observed in itself).

For that reason, it’s important to emphasize that we’re talking about the right way to do each of these things.

Keep in mind that for each point of the path I’ll be explaining what it is as well as how you can work on it in 1-2 practical ways that can immediately benefit you.

I’d also like for you to keep these 2 things in mind as you read through each point, to make it as productive and beneficial as possible for you:

- How am I doing in this? (that particular point) - How can I improve in this?

Remember, the 8-Fold Path is a practice, so you should approach it according to your own life. Your own stresses and difficulties (your suffering), what things truly bring you joy, and where you’re at in each area of the path. By doing this, you’ll take the most from it.

1. Cultivate Right View (or Right Understanding)

What is Right View? Right View, also called Right Understanding, is about cultivating wisdom or clarity and ultimately discovering the truth about ourselves and the world around us (all things as they are).

Exactly what’s included within right view or understanding? Most notably, understanding the 4 Noble Truths- understanding our suffering, how suffering is created, well-being, and how to follow the path to create that well-being and alleviate suffering.

As opposed to the knowledge you gain from reading a book, though, Right View emphasizes true understanding and clarity gained through insight, which involves direct experience with something.

This is where mindfulness comes in. It’s mindfulness which allows us to observe directly and clearly without obstructions.

Through mindfulness and sitting meditation practice (both Right Mindfulness and Right Concentration), you’re able to gain deep insights about the things you observe and interact with, and this leads to the cultivation of Right View.

In your everyday life, each effort you make to observe your daily challenges and difficulties and their causes clearly with the light of mindfulness is an opportunity to cultivate Right View.

Right View is powerful because it’s both a cause and an effect of all 7 other points on the path. Through practice, our view becomes clearer and we become wiser. And as our view or understanding deepens, so does our practice in all other areas.

2. Cultivate Right Thinking (or Right Intention)

What is Right Thinking (also known as Right Intention)? Thinking is very much the speech of our mind, so Right Thinking is about doing the right kind of thinking and refraining from the wrong kind.

The average person spends more time in their heads than they do being fully present. Of course, thinking itself isn’t bad, but most of the time the thoughts we’re occupying our minds with are nothing more than unproductive wanderings of mind.

So Right Thinking is, most importantly, refraining from this kind of mindless wandering, or distracted unintentional thinking, and instead only thinking when it’s necessary and holds a purpose, otherwise, we should be mindful of the task at hand.

When Right View is developed in us, Right Thinking is present because it’s those views and our understanding that fuels our state of mind. And Right Thinking is needed for Right Action because it’s often thinking which leads to action.

Mindful breathing is important here because it allows us to come back to the present moment when our mind wanders off or becomes fixated on something unwholesome.

In this way, our mindful breathing is a tool to help train our minds away from the mindless wandering it’s so naturally adept at or the harmful fixation it's stuck on.

What’s the best way to work on cultivating Right Thinking? The Buddha said it’s by being a part of a community who practices as such.

In modern terms, this could simply be a group of focused individuals working towards a united goal, both positive as well as realistic in their outlook. Ideally, though, this is a group of people who practice mindfulness.

Whether it’s mindful breathing, mindful walking, or a more extensive practice, even meeting once a week with a group of 2-3 people for one hour will greatly help.

Another important thing to keep in mind with Right Thinking is that wrong perceptions (which are included within Right View) can influence and color our thinking.

When we’re going through a difficult experience, it can be very beneficial to simply question the experience and ask ourselves “Is this really how it is?”, “Am I sure?”.

This is beneficial because it’s often our perception of the experience which is causing us to suffer, not the experience itself. In this way, we can break wrong perceptions and gain clarity about difficult situations.

3. Practice Right Speech

Traditionally, Right Speech refers to exactly what it sounds like: speaking in a way that’s conducive to your liberation from suffering and well-being and conducive to others liberation and well-being as well.

But communication has become very sophisticated in the past half-century. Now there’s more than just face-to-face speech, there’s phone calls, text chat, online forums, and social networks.

For that reason, perhaps this could now be more properly described as Right Communication.

Right Speech consists of 4 main efforts as presented by the Buddha:

- Speak truthfully - Don’t speak with a forked tongue. This refers to telling one person one thing and another something else, usually out of fear for what others will think or to try and manipulate another. - Don’t speak cruelly. Don’t say things to others that may hurt them, under any circumstance. - Don't exaggerate or embellish. Don’t misrepresent and deceive, essentially.

Right Speech is based on Right Thinking, because our speech originates in our thinking. Mindfulness can then work as a sort of editor for our speech, making sure we speak wholesomely.

The major idea to keep in mind here is that you should be working on changing your speaking habits so that your speech arises from your innate Buddhahood (your “highest” state of being- imagine the most wholesome version of yourself to help you do this), not from what’s often referred to in Buddhism as “unwholesome seeds”.

By unwholesome seeds, I’m referring to things such as bias or attitudes or deep-rooted anger or fear which will color how you speak and act.

To work on Right Speech in a very clear and simple way, you can adopt mindful speech and mindful (or deep) listening. These two practices are very important in Right Speech. You can read about both practices in my guide, The Mindfulness Survival Guide.

4. Practice Right Action

Right Action might sound a little confusing at first because technically most of the points on the path can be considered actions, but Right Action is most notably about the practice of non-violence towards ourselves and others.

Because of this, Right Action is a lot about cultivating compassion for ourselves and others.

Right Action is based on Right View, and the basis of the practice of Right Action is to do everything in mindfulness- mindfulness of action.

This is because it’s mindfulness which helps guide our actions and identify when we’re doing something that is harmful to ourselves or others, allowing us to course-correct.

Some of the most basic principles of Right Action sound very much like a moral code. Refrain from:

- Taking/Stealing - Exploiting - Hurting

And living in a way that you prevent those things from happening in the first place. But really the purpose of this is to not sew bad karma, which has the ability to ultimately affect your well-being by planting bad karmic seeds.

If all that sounded confusing, don’t let it be. By karma, I’m simply referring to the invisible string of cause and effect which exists in the world.

For example, by hurting someone else you not only affect someone else’s well-being but you lead yourself to potentially having your well-being affected by planting seeds of violence in your mind.

A big part of Right Action is also mindful consumption, which applies to multiple points on the 8-Fold Path, but is most applicable here.

By mindful consumption, I’m referring to mindfully or consciously consuming through each of your 6 senses (in Buddhism, the mind is a sense).

The general idea with mindful consumption is to make your best effort to only take in the kinds of things that nourish your body and mind.

This includes your associations, the information you take in via the internet, T.V., and movies, food and drink, and anything else you take in via your senses.

It’s easy to follow and begin cultivating right action within our everyday life. You can protect and nurture life, practice generosity, behave responsibly, or both consume and live mindfully.

5. Practice Right Diligence (or Right Effort)

Right Diligence, also called Right Effort, is about the quality of your effort. In other words, working towards or on something in a wholesome way.

On the flip side, wrong diligence is about working towards something that is unwholesome or causing you or someone else suffering.

Within Right Diligence is included 4-Fold Right Diligence, which are the 4 types of effort you can make towards cultivating Right Diligence:

- Preventing unwholesome seeds in our store consciousness which have not yet arisen from arising. - Helping the unwholesome seeds which have already arisen to go back to our store consciousness. - Finding ways to water the wholesome seeds in our store consciousness that have not yet arisen. - Nourishing the wholesome seeds that have already arisen so that they will stay present and grow stronger.

Store consciousness in Buddhism represents a sort of potentiality. There’s always the potential for anger, fear, hatred, joy, excitement, and peace but they’re not always apparent because the seeds aren’t being watered. Or in other words, our actions aren’t creating the conditions for them to arise.

This is important to keep in mind because when wholesome seeds aren’t present you can remember that you always have the ability to water them because they’re never truly gone.

And when unwholesome seeds aren’t present, it’s important to remember that they’re not necessarily gone forever and you need to nourish your mind and body daily to keep those unwholesome seeds in your store consciousness and out of your life.

Examples of unwholesome seeds include:

• Greed
• Hatred
• Ignorance
• Wrong views

When we embrace unwholesome seeds with our mindfulness, allowing them to rise to the surface and then being present for them in the spirit of an open and compassionate acceptance, they lose much of their strength and eventually go back to our store consciousness. This is an example of Right Diligence in action.

Examples of wholesome seeds include:

• Compassion
• Love
• Joy
• Peace & equanimity

Good seeds should be watered on a daily basis. This is the basis for a nourishing and healing daily practice.

Ultimately, Right Diligence is about following the Buddha’s Middle Way. What that means simply is not being too lax, but also not pushing yourself too hard. Ease and joy are 2 of the 7 factors of awakening (the conditions for awakening to arise in Buddhist practice), so they need to be present for Right Diligence to blossom.

It’s important for your daily practice of mindful living to be joyful and pleasant. If your practice itself seems strenuous and a cause of suffering in itself, that’s not Right Diligence.

A lack of Right Diligence often means you haven’t found a way of practice which works for you or you don’t yet see the benefit.

A simple way to practice Right Diligence is to sit and meditate, drink a cup of tea mindfully, or do something you enjoy like reading a good book (with positive, nourishing themes). Preferably, on a daily basis.

6. Practice Right Livelihood

Right livelihood is about supporting yourself in a way that doesn’t harm you or others and preferably contributes in some positive way to the well-being of others.

The way you support yourself can be an expression of your deepest self or a source of great suffering for you and for others. Clearly, it plays a pretty important role in the grand scheme of our lives.

In traditional Buddhist teaching this includes general categories such as selling:

• Arms
• Slavery
• Meat
• Alcohol
• Drugs
• Poisons

It also includes making prophesies or telling fortunes and not to live with material requisites in excess of one's immediate needs.

But right livelihood isn’t always so cut-and-dry.

Aside from the general categories, there are other things to be mindful of nowadays such as privacy, harming the environment, and whether your company's practices are based on deceiving (as some companies literally make a business model out of doing) or mistreating others.

Sometimes, it can be difficult to face Right Livelihood, especially when we’re deeply rooted in something we think may be Wrong Livelihood.

An important point about Right livelihood is that it's a collective matter, it’s not just about the person or people who do the act but also the demand or desire placed upon the thing which causes your livelihood to arise.

This is the far-reaching effect of karma, which is about more than just your individual actions affecting your life, but about the actions of all people affecting each other.

Right Mindfulness is an important part of Right Livelihood as well. It’s not enough just to work, you need to work with the energy of mindfulness. To do something beneficial for yourself and others but to work mindlessly isn’t enough.

The best thing you can do to work on Right Livelihood is to work with the energy of mindfulness and then ask yourself these questions:

- Does my work harm me or others? If so, how? - Does my work help me or others? If so, how?

By working with mindfulness and really taking the time to look deeply into our livelihood we can discover great clarity about our path in life and further deepen our practice along the way.

7. Practice Right Mindfulness

For those that have practiced mindfulness, you may be wondering what right and wrong mindfulness actually is. Even within mindfulness practice, there’s a right way to practice and a wrong way.

For the most part, Right Mindfulness refers to the fact that mindfulness practice should be done with the intention of looking deeply to discover insight, transcend suffering, and discover peace and happiness as opposed to just being mindful for the sake of being mindful.

Right Mindfulness is very important because when it's present, the other 7 parts on the path are present as well. This is because to live mindfully is to express our very Buddha nature, our “highest" state of being.

Thich Nhat Hanh refers to the major benefits of mindfulness practice as the "7 Miracles of Mindfulness”, the first 4 having to do with Samatha (calmness of mind), the first aspect of meditation, and the last 3 having to do with the second aspect Vipassana (clarity of mind):

• Right Mindfulness allows us to touch the joys in our life. With Right Mindfulness we literally have the ability to generate joy.
• Right Mindfulness allows others to become more present through the living example of our presence influencing others around us.
• Right Mindfulness allows you to nourish the object of your attention through presence. For this reason, mindfulness is a very powerful energy in our relationships.
• Being fully present for others through Right Mindfulness allows you to relieve others suffering.
• Right Mindfulness allows you to look deeply in your everyday life to discover key insights.
• From looking deeply arises understanding, the 6th miracle of mindfulness. Understanding is the very foundation of love, so this is very important.
• Finally, Right Mindfulness allows us to transform ourselves by touching our suffering deeply, looking and seeing deeply, and understanding deeply.

Right mindfulness is also the energy which allows us to bring light to our habit energy and gradually transform our lives. In this way, it helps us relieve much suffering and bring much peace and joy.

The 4 Establishments of Mindfulness are a very important teaching to keep in mind with regards to Right Mindfulness as they're the basis of mindfulness practice. They guide the entire practice of mindfulness. They are:

• Mindfulness of the body in the body. This is about being mindful of physical forms in various ways.
• Mindfulness of feelings in feelings. This is about being mindful of painful, pleasurable, and neutral feelings and beginning to separate these feelings from the experience itself.
• Mindfulness of the mind in the mind. This is about being mindful of the 51 other “mental formations” such as anger, frustration, joy, and jealousy (feelings are the 1st) in Buddhism.
• Mindfulness of objects of mind in objects of mind. This about being mindful of objects of mind, which includes anything you perceive. That perception creates an image in your mind. That mental image is an object of mind.

With the 4 Establishments of Mindfulness followed, your mindfulness practice will be Right Mindfulness practice and lead you on the path towards peace, happiness, and liberation.

8. Practice Right Concentration

Right Concentration is about learning how to utilize concentration in a wholesome way. It’s what allows us to act with our full being in any moment and discover deep insights about the world around us.

This is particularly concerned with meditation, an important part of nearly all Buddhist practice, but due to its nature can also be linked to all other parts of the path because to use what you've learned properly concentration should be applied.

For that reason, both adopting a regular meditation practice and applying yourself to the 8-Fold Path are ways to begin working on Right Concentration.

There are 2 types of concentration:

• Active concentration. Active concentration is placing your focus on things as they come. This is a shifting concentration and welcomes whatever may come. This is what I generally refer to as “Expanded Awareness”.
• Selective concentration. This is what we traditionally identify with concentration- choosing one object and focusing on it. This is what you do when you follow your breath while in meditation.

The primary function of concentration is to make ourselves deeply present, which is very important in mindfulness and sitting meditation practice.

Mindfulness is again an important aspect of another part of the path. Right Mindfulness brings about Right Concentration and Right Concentration leads to Right Action.

Concentration helps us to look deeply in our everyday lives and see the intimate connection between things and people.

The path as one

Keep in mind that as I mentioned before, the 8-Fold Path isn’t a set of sequential steps but rather a web of interrelated efforts.

It’s a path, one which doesn’t need to be perfect at any point. Simply approach it as the areas for improvement which, when taken together as one body, allows us to alleviate our suffering and realize true peace and happiness.

Also know that, because they’re so closely interrelated, when you work on one part of the path you inevitably improve in other areas as well.

To work on Right View is to improve Right Thinking and Right Action, among others. And to practice Right Mindfulness is to nurture every other place on the path.

This is true for each point on the path, so pick an area you’d like to focus on first based on how you answered the questions "How am I doing in this?” and "How can I improve in this?” and move forward with confidence from there.

The Buddha’s 4 Noble Truths and 8-Fold Path were created with a great love and compassion for all beings, and it’s in that spirit which I offer the path to you as well.

Not to be Buddhist or not (whether or not that interests you), but rather to take your life into your hands and decide that it’s too important to be lived idly.

The path doesn’t require you believe something other-worldly or extraterrestrial or even require you give up your current life as it is, it only requires you believe that there is a path out of suffering and to follow the path diligently to get yourself there.

A path to transcending your daily challenges and difficulties to a place of greater peace, happiness, and equanimity.

_____________________________

Download How to Walk the Buddha's 8-Fold Path

Download a free PDF version of How to Walk the Buddha's 8-Fold Path to True Peace and Happiness and begin following the Buddha's path:

_____________________________

3 Steps to Relieving Stress and Anxiety with Mindfulness and Buddhist Wisdom

6 years ago, I was suffering from heavy stress and anxiety.

I was having a hard time paying my bills and an even harder time figuring out what to do with my life. I felt like a failure, a screw up, and like most of my daily life was just one big fuzzy trudge through the mud.

Then I found out I was going to be a dad.

It was completely unexpected, but it took a few months before it really hit me. Once it did though, my stress and anxiety was amplified.

I wanted nothing more than to be an example to my soon-to-be son, but I had absolutely nothing to show for it. Those two things, on top of everything else, collided to create a sort of restlessness in me that perpetuated constant stress and anxiety. I had to find an answer.

What happened next was a long process of search and discovery, one thing leading to another before I finally landed on the answer. Of course, the answer wasn't what I thought it was (and at first I didn't like the answer), but I found it. I’ll get to that in a sec.

We all think our situation is unique. We think our minds are crazy and chaotic and we can’t sit, let alone stop, and that there’s nothing we can do about it. Or, we’ve tried some things and nothing’s worked. Either way, we think it’s just how we are.

The reality is though, this is a universal condition we all suffer from. “The monkey mind”, a term coined by the Buddha over 2,500 years ago, is a basic condition we experience simply from being human.

In 8 Mindful Steps to Happiness, Bhante Henepola Gunaratana (the author of Mindfulness in Plain English) enlightens with this interesting information about the period of time the Buddha lived (in the area which is now the India/Nepal region):

"Rapid technological advances. Increased wealth. Stress. Stable lives and careers come under the pressure of accelerating change. The twentyfirst century? No, the sixth century b.c.—a time of destructive warfare, economic dislocation, and widespread disruption of established patterns of life, just like today.

In conditions similar to ours, the Buddha discovered a path to lasting happiness. His discovery—a step-by-step method of mental training to achieve contentment—is as relevant today as ever."

When I first read this it really surprised me. “So, the world the Buddha lived in isn’t all that much different from our own.” I thought. This, to me, is very enlightening.

We aren’t as different as we think. The conditions which create stress are the same for all of us and have affected humans for thousands of years. And the cure has existed for just as long.

Buddhist wisdom tells us that just as there’s a central quality to all of our suffering, there’s a central cure for it as well. Stress and anxiety are no exceptions.

When looking at stress and anxiety, certain recurring themes rise to the surface. If you can work on these principles, in tandem with your daily mindfulness and sitting meditation practice, you can not only relieve stress and better manage your anxiety, you can even break the patterns of behavior that cause stress and anxiety in the first place and overcome them completely.

The steps below are what worked for me personally, so know that I talk from direct experience.

3 Steps to Relieving Stress and Anxiety with Mindfulness and Buddhist Wisdom

In The Little Book of Mindfulness, I talk briefly about the first aspect of meditation: samatha.

If you haven’t read it yet I’d suggest doing so as it will give you much more information that will aid in your efforts. You can get it free (just an email is required) by clicking here.

Samatha is a Sanskrit word which can be translated as “stopping”, and it’s the act of stopping, calming, resting, and healing to cultivate a tranquil mind.

Within this piece of Buddhist wisdom exists essentially all the components needed to not only relieve but altogether overcome stress and anxiety.

By letting the light of mindfulness guide you, you can use this ancient wisdom to transform your everyday state of mind and realize a great amount of relief from both stress and anxiety.

1. Bring the pebble (mind) to rest

The first step, and really the foundation of all meditative practice, is to calm the mind. So it goes without saying that establishing a strong mindfulness meditation practice is the key here.

By taking time to:

1. Learn mindfulness meditation
2. Establish sitting meditation as a daily habit, and sticking with it
3. And then work on making mindfulness a way of life

...you can cultivate an extraordinary ever-present state of tranquility within you.

The basic state of a stressed or anxious mind is of chaos, disorder, or a lack of unity.

So by focusing on a central point, especially something which has a significant effect on our state of mind and stress and anxiety levels already (the breath), we experience great relief and generate a still calmness, like a pebble resting at the bottom of a lake.

And with that calmness comes clarity and the ability to identify the very patterns of behavior which are generating our stress and anxiety.

2. Identify harmful patterns

Once you’ve begun to calm the mind, you’ll start to be able to identify harmful stress and anxiety-creating patterns of behavior with your everyday mindfulness practice.

Before calming the mind, you’re traveling through life with dulled senses. Lots of things are happening “behind the scenes” (in the mind), but you can’t detect them because you’re not tuned correctly.

Just as you can’t see down to the bottom of a body of water with ripples running across the top of it, without calm you can’t have clarity, and this affects your ability to navigate life’s challenges skillfully.

By cultivating a tranquil mind, you not only calm the mind, but you remove obstructions which kept you from seeing with clarity. This is critical, without which this step wouldn’t be possible.

Examples of harmful stress and anxiety-inducing patterns of behavior are:

“I can’t stop, I have so much to do."

“I can’t handle this, I’m not capable."

“As soon as I get this done, I’ll take a break.” (hint: the break never happens)

“I’m fine, I’ll stop later.”

“What if this happens?"

‘What am I going to do”

“They’re supposed to listen to me."

“Why didn’t this happen the way I wanted!!"

Another great example of this is in the West’s idea of a vacation. Many in the West make big plans for vacations with a set of events and a to-do list.

But what ends up happening is you get back from vacation more tired than when you began! And with that, the point of the vacation is lost.

We’ve forgotten how to truly rest our body and mind and suffer greater stress as a result. By identifying these harmful patterns of behavior, we're halfway to cutting off the source of the stress altogether and experiencing the greatest relief.

So what are you actually supposed to do?

Your only job here is to acknowledge these thoughts, feelings, and behaviors with your mindfulness as you notice them. Don’t read into them, don’t pry, just acknowledge what arises nonjudgmentally.

This sounds simple, but it's often difficult and takes time.

Patience is very important from this point on, but you've gained considerable relief along with the other benefits of your meditation practice, so provided you continue practicing consistently you should have more than enough motivation to continue (most of the time at least).

3. Be present & give yourself time to heal

Once these patterns have begun to arise and become gradually clearer to you, you need to give yourself time to heal.

Continue to be present for these patterns- the thoughts, feelings, and actions- and have patience.

Patience can’t be overstated here. Developing mindfulness as a way of life takes a lot of work, but it’s so worth it. You need to have patience and allow things to develop and come as they will.

It’s also very important to be compassionate with yourself as you tend to face somewhat uncomfortable things about yourself at this point.

Prioritizing your mindfulness practice truly is the most important effort here, not just for clarity and calm sake, but also to stay nonjudgmental. This will help you generate and maintain self-compassion.

Making the effort to simply be present, patient, and compassionate with yourself as these things arise will greatly help you reduce their hold over you with time.

Your mindful presence is a very healing energy. Truly nothing else is needed.

A final word

The truth is, daily stressors and the situations which cause you anxiety may never go away.

Nearly every day, I’m confronted with challenges that test my patience. But just because those potential stressors exist doesn’t mean you have to be controlled by them.

You can change your relationship with those stressors. By changing how you relate to them you can not only manage them better but with time you can cut off the source of the stress and anxiety altogether.

Work to bring calm to the mind, identify harmful patterns of behavior, and be present, patient, and compassionate for the healing process.

Relief is possible if you let the light of mindfulness and the wisdom of samatha guide you.

5 Powerful Ways Mindfulness Meditation Will Change Your Life

Years ago, I bought a book on a whim. Little did I know that it would completely transform my life and lead me on the path I tread today.

That book was The Miracle of Mindfulness, and it was the first book that truly taught me about the power of mindfulness meditation practice.

The book is technically a letter written by author Thich Nhat Hanh to a friend in Vietnam at the time, so it’s not organized particularly well nor does it clearly explain everything it mentions. But it’s a beautifully profound book written by someone I consider a dear teacher. It was more than enough.

At the time, I could barely get my head out of the future long enough to get my work done and handle all my other responsibilities. I was stressed out about my bills, worrying about the future and how I was going to support my future son (who was to be born just months from then), and constantly reflected on the disappointment I felt towards myself for having still not accomplished anything of real value in my life.

It’s hard, perhaps impossible, to completely put into words what mindfulness did for me. When I think of how mindfulness changed my life all I want to do is silently scream from a mountain top, where no one will hear me but the rocks and clouds.

When I think of how profound discovering, and practicing, mindfulness has been for me I feel a sense of heaviness in reflecting on so many difficult memories, now with a sense of peace, relief, and sincere joy.

Whether it’s here in this post or somewhere in the future, I hope the power of mindfulness finds you as well.

5 Powerful Ways Mindfulness Meditation Will Change Your Life

1. It will help you identify patterns

I talk often about how mindfulness helps us overcome internal challenges. One way this is clearly demonstrated is in its ability to help us identify patterns.

What do I mean by identifying patterns? Mindfulness, more than anything else, gives us clarity. When we begin to gain clarity, we start to be able to identify bad patterns of behavior such as avoidance when faced with stress and difficult situations, bias or attitude in the face of a certain person or persons, and a bad habit when handling a specific strong emotion such as fear or anger.

When we work to identify these patterns and then handle them skillfully, our whole world can change. Suddenly we see clearly all the various ways we suffer and, in many cases, the simple (but not necessarily easy) solutions to overcoming these bad patterns of behavior.

2. It will show you clearly the source of the problem (and give you a way to overcome, or better work with, it)

More than just identifying patterns, with practice mindfulness can show you clearly where the source of the problem exists altogether.

If you notice you mentally judge a specific person every time you walk up to them, with practice you may realize that you have a bottled-down sense of envy and jealousy towards them because you feel inadequate having still not achieved any of your own goals and dreams. And that’s just one of countless examples.

But you’re not just left alone at this point to figure out how to overcome it. Many internal challenges can be overcome by your compassionate and loving presence alone, needing nothing more than for you to stop and breathe mindfully until the challenge can dissipate having now risen to the surface of your consciousness.

3. It will give you a way to bring yourself back to “center” 24/7

Mindfulness isn’t restricted to the meditation cushion, although that is the foundation of mindfulness practice.

Mindfulness is a tool you can use anywhere and anytime you feel overwhelmed, stressed, anxious, fearful, or angry.

For me, sometimes this was going back to my breath. Other times, this was walking mindfully or simply stopping and being mindful of the feeling or emotion. In every case, this was about going back to myself and nourishing my well-being simply and compassionately with my presence.

4. It will show you the truth of the present moment

My mindfulness practice showed me that the past and present are nothing more than ideas in our mind.

Sure, the past happened and it may be important, but it doesn’t literally exist anywhere but in memories and in concept.

And the future, while important to plan for, in actual practice is nothing more than estimations, assumptions, and imagination.

When we live tied to the realms of past and future as much as the present, our lives suffer. Understanding this changed how I live.

I grew up a dreamer, not so much a dreamer as in dreaming of my goals and aspirations but a literal day-dreamer, my mind always wandering off and thinking about something other than what I was doing.

I lived most of my early life half here and half in my head, always feeling like I was half-asleep but never really knowing why. For this single reason, mindfulness would have changed my life. But it just so happened that mindfulness would have a much more significant impact on me as time went on.

5. It will show you the path to true happiness

Most of us chase happiness thinking if we make a lot of money, find our dream partner, or attain great power we’ll be set for life. The insights I received from my mindfulness practice not only simplified life and showed me that everyone is searching for happiness, just in countless different ways, but that true happiness is inner peace.

In a state of inner peace, we still feel but are unmoved by life’s difficult challenges and maintain a clear and ever-present calmness throughout life.

And when we’re not facing challenges, we’re able to clearly identify moments of peace and joy and appreciate all that’s around us, even something as simple as the beauty of the blue sky.

You don’t know it from the outside, but when you begin to practice you realize that these simple moments are absolutely and totally fulfilling. They’re the single most profound moments of your life when you feel utterly at peace with everything around you.

Of course, realizing true inner peace is easier said than done, but gaining clarity about the path and seeing clearly how we get there is a huge step in the right direction. And mindfulness helps us do that.

6 Great Ways to Implement Mindfulness in the Workplace

Five months ago, I left the family business to write semi-full-time (with freelancing jobs on the side to help pay the bills).

It was a scary shift for me and my family, but a huge step forward towards my aspirations of writing full-time and growing Buddhaimonia into a valuable resource for others.

And while I’ve now slowly grown accustomed to my new schedule, I had worked in an office of some sort for the previous 8 years and knew all too well how difficult it was to maintain a mindfulness practice within a hectic office environment.

With practice, time, and patience though I was able to implement my mindfulness practice into my workday. And that didn't just bring me much relief from the daily stresses, it made me more effective at my job as well.

At first, it can seem like there’s no use. Most days you forget to be mindful altogether, and when you do remember it’s not always clear what you should be mindful of.

But by getting creative, you can not only bring mindfulness to your workday, you can downright transform your workdays with your mindfulness practice.

6 Great Ways to Implement Mindfulness in the Workplace

Below, you’ll find 6 great mindfulness practices and strategies to help you turn your workday from 8 hours of stress and mindlessness to 8 hours of nourishing and wakeful mindful living.

1. Go Home

No, I'm not talking about packing your bag and driving home!

Depending on what you do for a living, we can all generally become quite mindless at certain points in our day. Taking a minute every hour or so to go home to your breathing and wake up to the present moment can be an invaluable tool for your well-being as well as your effectiveness at work.

And going home to your breath is easy. It takes just 4 simple steps:

• Turn your attention inward to your body. Whether standing or sitting down, become mindful of the weight of your body and any other sensations that arise.
• Become aware of your breathing. Now, turn your attention to your in-breath and out-breath. Follow the length of each in-breath and out-breath from beginning to end. Your concentration will be broken from time to time and that's OK.
• Acknowledge that which arises. While following the length of your breath, thoughts, feelings, and sensations will arise and distract you from concentrating on your breathing. Mindfulness works like a field of awareness which acknowledges everything within a given moment, so simply acknowledge what arises with your mindfulness and don't treat it as a distraction or anything negative.
• Return to your breath. Simply return to following the length of your breath just as before.

Practice going home for just 30-60 seconds at first, lengthening to 2 minutes after a while if you prefer. No matter how busy you are, you have a few seconds to breathe mindfully a couple times a day.

Do this every few hours in the beginning to "break up" the activity of your day and give yourself a jolt of wakefulness. After a while, this will begin promoting more mindfulness throughout your day by reminding you to be mindful.

2. Notice mental formations

This is one of my favorite mindfulness-in-the-workplace practices. This refers to noticing specific emotions, biases, and attitudes that arise when coming in contact with others, whether communication occurs or not.

This is one of the most powerful and valuable practices on this list because it can begin to help clue you in about hidden biases and harmful perceptions you hold within you.

To do this, simply make it a focus to at least be mindful when first approaching someone, and then consciously acknowledge whatever arises within those first few moments.

Even this short period of mindfulness can be very telling for ourselves in our own practice.

3. Walk mindfully to and from your workspace

Walking meditation is one of the, if not the, most convenient mindfulness practices.

Think about it: we walk everywhere, all day long, every single day. Therefore, to focus on walking as being a moment in which you remember to be mindful can have a big impact on improving your mindfulness practice and helping you find more peace and relief throughout each day.

But we often don’t think about the workplace as being a place for walking mindfully. And while it may not be ideal, it’s absolutely viable. And if you think you have to do walking meditation slowly, think again.

Some Zen monks and students, depending on the school and lineage, walk at a very fast pace (literally a power-walk) while doing walking meditation, so with a little practice it’s absolutely possible to bring a little walking meditation into your workday.

You can read how to practice walking meditation here.

4. Communicate mindfully

I’ve often mentioned mindful communication with regards to loved ones, but it’s an effective tool for improving the quality of the communication between you and co-workers while simultaneously deepening your mindfulness practice.

What’s more important in the workplace than communication? To communicate mindfully isn’t just to improve your mindfulness practice, it’s also to make communication between teammates and co-workers more clear and effective. This makes mindful communication invaluable in the workplace.

The only thing about mindful communication is, it can be a bit of an advanced mindfulness practice. If you're just starting out in your practice and want to immediately take advantage of the practice of mindful communication, my suggestion is this:

• When listening, really listen. This means that when someone is talking to you, whether directly or to a group through a meeting, be fully present for their words. Don't pick up your phone, purposely distract yourself with "What should I make for dinner today?", or stare out the window. Don't seek to judge their words either, simply listen to everything they have to say first and let it sink in before chiming in (do this whenever possible).
• Become aware of the effect of your words. Mindful speech, to some degree, means to become aware of the effect the words you speak can have on others. If you're just starting with mindful communication, I'd suggest to focus on this for a moment before you speak and be aware of their reactions as you're speaking with them. The main intention is to communicate clearly and in a way that doesn't intentionally hurt the other person.

5. Change how you engage with technology

This point is all about using technology in a way that supports your mindfulness practice and overall well-being.

The main idea here is to stop mindless use of technology by stopping you at the moment you go to engage with it. Here's a few resources, all of which I personally use:

• Momentum Chrome extension. This is a really awesome Chrome extension I started using recently. When you pop up a new tab, instead of showing either a list of your most commonly visited webpages or your collection of Chrome apps, it shows a page that's meant to focus you instead of distract you. You could use this for anything, but in this example clicking on the line under "What is your main focus for today" and typing something like "be mindful" is a really effective way of surfing on your desktop or laptop more mindfully:

• Bell of mindfulness Chrome extension. At this point, you can probably tell I browse the internet with Chrome. I've written about this second Chrome extension a few times before because of how incredible it is. This extension rings a traditional Buddhist bell on a timer to help break your workflow up for a moment of mindful breathing (this can be used very effectively when paired with your practice of going home to your breath). You can set the timer for whatever period of time you'd like.

• Make a mindful smartphone wallpaper. This isn't a specific app of any sort, but simply the act of making a wallpaper for your smartphone that will remind you to be mindful every time you pick up your phone. You can use the Over app on an iPhone and the Phonto app on Android to add text such as "be mindful" or "connect mindfully" to a picture. This is very effective because you see it every time you go to pick up your phone.

6. Break-time meditation

Utilizing your break positively can be a very effective strategy for bringing your mindfulness practice into the workplace.

Whether this is a meditation session in your office or car or a mindful eating session by yourself or silently with another, this can be a very effective break from your day that further supports working mindfully the second half of your workday.

The more you’re mindful, the more you remember to be mindful, so this can be a valuable addition to your practice.

If you go home to your breathing throughout each day, take a mindful break, walk mindfully to and from your work area, focus on being mindful of what arises when coming in contact with others, and make sure to communicate mindfully whether that be with a teammate, co-worker, leader, or boss your days will be guided with mindfulness.

It takes work to get to this point, but if you work on each area, one step at a time, you’ll be able to transform the environment within your mind, which will transform the environment of your workplace.

Clarity, relief, and peace don’t have to be reserved for a few minutes at the end of each work day. You can find time to breathe and be mindful throughout each day, whether at work or home, by using these 6 simple mindfulness practices.