10 Essential Keys to Mindful Living

More than anything else, my focus for this year is to live a more mindful life.

Ultimately, mindful living is a simple task: do more things with mindfulness. There's nothing more to it. But, just because something is simple doesn't mean that it's easy. It's anything but that.

I talk about this from time to time, but to live even a little more mindfully creates a significant difference in the quality of your everyday life. If you can to get to a point where you're living even 5% of your life mindfully, you'll likely see a complete transformation of your daily life from stressed, anxious, and discontent to calm, peaceful, and happy.

But even that 5% can be very difficult to achieve, especially considering the adverse conditions of the modern world which mostly come in the form of myriad distractions to our mindfulness practice and general effort to live less mindlessly and more awake to ourselves in each moment.

There are many intangibles, and one or two tangible factors, which I've found to be essential to the overall practice of mindful living.

Mindful living comes with a laundry list of significant benefits. But, really, when it gets down to it, it's all about being happier and more at peace.

And that's what mindfulness allows us to do, to wake up to our lives and live intentionally, taking the reigns and living consciously as opposed to being swayed this way and that by our conditioning and habitual patterns. These patterns run very deep, and they affect everything that we do, so mindfulness practice is essential to realizing true peace and happiness.

I hope these 10 essential keys to mindful living help you live a more mindful life, filled with greater peace, happiness, and the skillfulness to navigate life's challenges.

10 Essential Keys for Mindful Living

1. Prioritize mindful living

This is one of those points I mention time and time again because it really is that important.

What does it mean to prioritize your practice of mindful living? In a nutshell, this refers to treating it with a certain level of importance.

Oftentimes, we make a decision to do something, such as workout regularly, and end up falling off of our goal because we didn't treat it with the same level of importance as the other things in our life.

The reality is, each of the activities and responsibilities which make up our life exist on a scale. Depending on the importance of the activity, it may rest higher or lower on this scale.

When we add something new to this scale, unless we consciously make the effort to do the opposite, it gets placed at the bottom and is therefore much more likely to get pushed aside for other things.

By prioritizing your practice of mindful living, you're saying, "This is something important to me. I value my well-being, and this is an important key in my effort to take care of myself and live a happier and more peaceful life. This is as important as anything else."

You can learn more about important intangible factors such as this, and a step-by-step in-depth mindful living program, by checking out my book Zen for Everyday Life.

2. Harness motivation

Motivation is one of those things which can either help or hurt you, and it all comes down to whether or not you've been able to identify what your true motivation is in the first place.

Why do you practice? Why do you push your practice aside? Gaining clarity about this allows you to change the script and replace it with something more compelling towards your practice and away from those things which are less beneficial. Oftentimes, just being really clear about why exactly you practice and how those other things are less beneficial is enough to truly harness motivation towards supporting your mindfulness practice.

Oftentimes, just being really clear about why exactly you practice and how those other things are less beneficial is enough to truly harness motivation towards supporting your mindfulness practice.

By identifying your motivation to practice, as well as your motivation to brush off practice and put it aside for other things, you can construct your daily life in a way that promotes your practice and demotes other activities which are less beneficial. For this reason, understanding your motivation can be an important tool in making mindful living more habitual.

Interestingly enough, it's mindfulness which allows us to bring clarity to these motivating factors, so if you know how to practice mindfulness you already have the key to "activating" this asset to your practice so to speak.

3. Have patience

This is one of those points that's definitely easier said than done, but simply becoming aware of it is often very helpful.

The reality is that most of us approach our mindfulness practice with the expectation to gain or feel something by some certain amount of time, and when we don't arrive there in the amount of time we originally expected, we end up discouraging ourselves from the very practice which is supposed to help us.

Meditation and mindfulness practice move along their own timetables. And sure, the more dedicated our practice the more we can affect this, but we still have no way of making accurate expectations.

No matter how hard we practice, we still never know how long something is going to take. We don't know when something or other will happen, so we must be patient and allow it to unfold as it will.

This can be difficult at first, but ultimately it helps us quite a bit because it begins to train us in the art of letting go and living naturally, allowing things to unfold as they will. And this will be a beneficial skill for the rest of our lives.

4. Open yourself fully to the practice of making friends with yourself

Meditation and mindfulness practice, in many ways, is the practice of making friends with yourself. By this, I mean learning about yourself intimately and training yourself to become your friend as opposed to your critical enemy, something almost all of us can relate to being at least at some point in our lives.

Most of us are ruled by an internal dialogue that is mean and hurtful and very damaging to our self-esteem and mental well-being. This internal dialogue is one of the primary things which our practice of mindful living allows us to work through, slowly identifying the footprint of the critical ego and allowing us to fully accept and heal these wounds with compassion and loving-kindness one-by-one.

By opening yourself to the process, and practice, of making friends with yourself, you're proclaiming that you're ready to face every part of yourself, even the deepest and darkest parts. It won't be easy either way, but by identifying ahead of time that this will be a part of your mindful living practice

It won't be easy either way, but by identifying ahead of time that this will be a part of your mindful living practice and accepting that fact you open the gateway to a much more easeful path through the process of making friends with yourself and finding peace with this internal dialogue.

5. Consume mindfully

As important as anything else is creating an environment conducive to mindful living (and peace and happiness), and one of the major ways to do that is through mindful consumption.

Mindful consumption is the practice of reviewing your life and identifying which are harmful and which are helpful factors, then rearranging your life in a way that promotes your well-being. This includes everything from the people you choose to surround yourself with to your habits with electronic devices such as your smartphone and T.V.

If you expect to create a strong mindful living practice without working through some of these areas which may be continually harming your well-being, you'll just detract from your practice and keep hurting yourself in the long run.

It's important to create an environment that is conducive to not just a more mindful life but greater peace and happiness in general. After all, isn't that the point? If something in our life doesn't promote our physical or mental well-being or that of our loved ones, it probably needs to go.

Ultimately, you'll be the judge of this, but by making this a priority, you'll put yourself in a position to live an overall healthier and more mindful life.

Learn more about mindful consumption and creating an environment conducive to greater peace and happiness here: ZfEL Episode #3.

6. Practice easeful discipline

Discipline is as important in a daily mindfulness and meditation practice as in anything else in life, but it's important to go about it the right way.

Don't approach your mindfulness practice from the perspective of an athlete or someone trying to push themselves to their limit. Mindfulness practice, and navigating the challenges of everyday life in general, needs to be done in an easeful and joyful way.

Your practice should, typically, be very enjoyable and feel very easy. This isn't a hard or fast rule, though. Sometimes, meditation and mindfulness practice can be quite difficult.

Both require us to face the darkest parts of ourselves, and as a result, sometimes our meditation and mindfulness practice can be quite difficult. But, in general, your practice should be enjoyable and refreshing.

Depending on the challenges you bring to your practice, this may be difficult for you. But know that this is more a state of mind to bring to your practice and something to remind yourself of from time to time more than anything else, so it can be developed over time.

7. Cultivate loving-kindness

As I just mentioned, mindfulness practice can be difficult. Both to make a way of life, a more habitual activity, and simply the practice in itself at times when we're forced to face uncomfortable parts of ourselves.

For this reason, the quality of loving-kindness is absolutely essential. With loving-kindness, we change from being overly critical and harmful to ourselves to being kind and compassionate when we experience these dark patches. It's this kindness and compassion which transforms everything and they're essential parts of a successful meditation practice of any kind, including mindfulness.

It's this kindness and compassion which transforms everything and they're essential parts of a successful meditation practice of any kind, including mindfulness.

You can learn more about the role loving-kindness plays in mindfulness practice by listening to ZfEL episode #16: How to Heal the Wounds in Our Heart with Mindfulness and Loving-Kindness.

8. Find a mindful community

A community is one of those things which you can get away without having if you really need to, but which without you'll be greatly hindering your ability to stay consistent, create a thriving practice, and even just to stick to the practice in the first place.

A community of like-minded individuals, even one you only get to meet once every 2-4 weeks, is priceless and will not only help you stick to your practice but will help you develop your practice further in less time (that's not the point, but still worth mentioning).

Without a community of other mindful practitioners, you're alone in your practice and have no one which you can communicate with regarding your challenges.

Even simply for this reason it's highly valuable, but there's also an accountability factor which makes a community a powerful tool in helping develop your mindfulness practice into a daily habit (or, in other words, a way of life).

There are many ways to go about finding a community, including simply searching Google for mindfulness meditation classes in your area, but here are a few links to certain practice groups which you may find helpful:

1. Wake Up – Get Involved!
2. The Mindfulness Bell – Sangha Directory
3. Shambhala Directory
4. Plumline: Plum Village Google+ Digital Groups

9. Create a Zen space at home

A Zen space is my fancy term for a dedicated meditation space. This is the one real tangible item on this list, but it's no less important than anything else.

To create a dedicated meditation space in your home, a space which you've decided as being a place for meditation and mindfulness and nothing else, is a sign of having prioritized your practice.

A space such as this encourages your practice because it creates a place you can go to find peace at any time of day (provided you're at home). It's a dedicated place with all potential distractions removed. This encourages your meditation and mindfulness practice on multiple levels.

If you'd like to learn more about creating a Zen space, read How to Create a Zen Space.

And for more information on creating a home meditation practice:

1. Read: 5 Tools to Help You Start Your Home Meditation Practice
2. Listen: How to Create a Home Meditation Practice

10. Follow the path of least resistance

The path of least resistance is a simple principle which I've used time and time again to help me develop and strengthen both my home meditation practice and my daily practice of mindful living.

The basic idea is this: we naturally do the thing which is easiest to do at any given moment, unless we make an intentional push to act in some other way. Which is difficult, if not impossible, to do consistently.

So what do you do? Are we just destined to push aside our meditation practice for the siren song of the lazy boy and primetime T.V.? Is it always going to be an uphill battle against the habit of mindlessness? Not if you utilize this knowledge.

The path of least resistance has different applications whether we're talking about sitting meditation practice or the overall practice of mindful living, but in all cases the same general idea applies: make it as easy to practice as possible and more difficult to do those other things which distract you from your practice. Or, in other words, encourage an environment conducive to mindfulness and discourage mindless activities.

Learn more about the path of least resistance: 5 Steps to Making Meditation a Daily Habit.

The Complete Moment-to-Moment Guide to Mindful Living

Years ago, the practice of mindfulness changed my life dramatically. I went from being stressed out and disconnected from the world around me to being more at peace and present in my day-to-day life.

Much of this post was adapted from my second book, Zen for Everyday Life, which is the most complete moment-to-moment mindfulness practice guide I've written to date. I provide freely dozens of posts, guides, and podcast episodes here for you which can be used to begin, progress, and further deepen a daily mindfulness practice like what was discussed in this post (which you're welcome to explore). However, Zen for Everyday Life thoughtfully organizes much of it into one place in a clear and simple way for you to implement effectively.

If you're interested in effectively bringing more mindfulness into your daily life to relieve stress, realize greater peace, and become more present in your day-to-day life, then Zen for Everyday Life will guide you.

Click here to learn more about Zen for Everyday Life and purchase your copy:

Join the This Moment Book Launch Team and Receive 4 Exclusive Benefits

I'd like to ask for your help.

Self-publishing a book is a lot of work and there are so many moving parts. This is definitely more than I can do all by myself. At least, if I want the book to have as much impact as I know it can have.

As we're approaching the launch of my new book, This Moment: How to Live Fully and Freely in the Present Moment, I've decided to try something different. I'm inviting 100 of my readers to join me in creating a special "This Moment Book Launch Team." It's a peer group of people who are willing help get the word out about the book.

Team Member Benefits

As a This Moment Book Launch Team member, you will get:

1. A free, digital review copy of the book in advance of the publication date (PDF).
2. Exclusive access to me in a Private Facebook Group.
3. A special 30-minute live group session with me prior to the launch of the book.
4. A 25% off annual membership discount on my soon-to-be-released Mindful Way program. This monthly membership program will give you everything you need to make mindfulness a way of life and help you stay consistent in your practice moving forward.

Team Member Requirements

As a member of the This Moment Book Launch Team you:

• Write a brief book review testimonial for use on the blog and official book page.
• Help spread the word about the book in any way you can, to your friends, family and beyond, starting the week of February 15th to the February 29th release date.
• Share ideas and brainstorm additional ways we might further help bring the message to an even greater audience. All ideas are welcome.

That’s it! The 100 team members will be selected next week upon which emails will go out to everyone that applied (and those accepted will be given the link to the Private Facebook Group).

Team Member Sign Up

UPDATE: Thank you for taking an interest in supporting the book. Team sign-ups are now closed. If you signed up to the This Moment Book Launch Team, look for an email from me on Friday, Feb. 12th.

Thank you again for the support. This is a book which I'm standing behind with all of my being, so it's amazing to know I won't be alone.

Peace, Matt

Free Guided Meditations for Greater Peace and Clarity

Sometimes, I wonder what the Buddha would have thought about guided meditations.

I think he would have approved of them as useful tools for the beginner learning the ways of meditation, or even for someone experienced that's simply going through a difficult challenge and needs a voice to guide them to a place of greater calmness and clarity of mind.

In any case, more than anything else, it matters what you think. What you feel. What works for you. And that's why I, and why so many others, enjoy guided meditations.

Guided meditations are more than just words on a page (as much as I enjoy writing). The sound of the teacher or speaker in your ear guiding you through the meditation is the closest thing to having a real teacher right there with you as you can get without actually having one there.

My podcast, Zen for Everyday Life, features two weekly episodes. One is a talk discussing similar topics like those I discuss on the blog. The second is a free guided meditation on everything from classic mindfulness meditation forms such as the Zen form of zazen, to loving-kindness, to Thich Nhat Hanh's practice of Going Home, as well as new and unique free guided meditations that I've created such as Healing Through Understanding and Just Being.

Below is a neatly compiled list of the best free guided meditations from the Zen for Everyday Life podcast. Check back here regularly for new guided meditations.

Free Guided Meditations for Greater Peace and Clarity

*Click the corresponding link to go to the guided meditation page. Right click the big yellow download button and click "Save file as..." to download the file to your computer or simply hit Play to listen on the page.

1. Breath As Life - The basic mindfulness practice of mindful breathing. This is a 1-click free download separate from the podcast. Nothing, not even an email, is required to download this. All you need to do is click the link. Enjoy.
2. Going Home - This guided mindfulness meditation is on Thich Nhat Hanh's classic mindful breathing practice. This is the simplest of practices and is really what mindful breathing is all about- going home to yourself with mindfulness.
3. Zazen (Zen sitting meditation) - This a guided meditation for the classic Zen form of mindfulness meditation. It's basically mindful breathing in a very free manner (as opposed to Vipassana, which is more active).
4. Minful Refresh - This is a guided morning meditation for starting your day off fresh each day with a simple mindfulness practice. This, to date, is one of the most popular guided meditations I've done and a personal favorite.
5. Just Being - Just Being is very close to the Zen practice of "just sitting" or shikantaza. It's the practice of accepting everything openly as it is with mindfulness and just being in this moment. Another community + personal favorite.
6. Healing Through Understanding - This is a very active guided meditation and it's all about opening the mind after a difficult conflict with another person.
7. A Mindful Welcome - A Mindful Welcome is about the fundamental shift from “hostile enemy” to “welcoming friend” we must make to begin the path of healing emotionally.
8. Mindful Wisdom (@42:16 in the episode)- Mindful Wisdom is a moment-to-moment mindfulness and contemplative practice I created for unlocking your own intuitive wisdom. What would the Buddha do?
9. Mindfulness of Body (@40:10 in the episode) - The traditional mindfulness of body meditation.
10. Loving-Kindness - Loving-kindness meditation is the traditional Buddhist meditation practice of cultivating positive feelings and well-wishes for all beings.
11. Mindful Walking / Walking Meditation (Formal Practice) - The formal practice of walking meditation typically done immediately following a session of sitting meditation in many Buddhist circles.
12. Mindful Cleaning - A powerful mindfulness practice that takes a typically boring and mundane activity and turns it into something nourishing and delightful.
13. Mindful Driving - A powerful mindfulness practice for turning a typically mindless autopilot activity into an opportunity for peace and mindfulness. 
14. Mindful Breathing (Basic Mindfulness Meditation) - The fundamental practice of mindful breathing. When you hear “mindfulness meditation” (which typically refers to the secular practice of mindfulness) this is the practice that’s being referred to.
15. Mindful Walking (Informal Everyday Practice) - The “everyday” informal practice of mindful walking. 
16. Mindful Eating - If you’re looking for a way to live your everyday life more mindfully and even meditatively, this is a great practice which serves as one of the core mindfulness exercises.
17. Being in Your Meditation Space - A special guided meditation from my course Meditation for Everyday Life which is designed to help you "settle" into your designated meditation space and cultivate it into a place of solace.
18. Mindful Smiling - This guided meditation is all about using the power of intention and the natural effect of smiling with mindfulness.
19. Rise with the Sun (a Guided Morning Meditation) - Rise with the Sun is about taking inventory before the day gets started so that you’re on solid ground and can handle the challenges of your day with more poise and clarity.

And remember to subscribe to the Zen for Everyday Life podcast for new weekly talks & guided meditations:

On the blog: Zen for Everyday Life with Matt Valentine

On iTunes: Zen for Everyday Life with Matt Valentine

Healing Through Understanding: A Simple Compassion Meditation for Healing and Clarity

Each day, we’re presented with challenges associated when interacting with other people.

It’s inevitable, there’s no way to get around it: when two people come together there’s always a chance for conflict to arise.

But each day you also have a choice: to let it go on affecting you in the same way and causing you stress, anxiety, anger, and resentment or to do something about it.

I know, people tell you to "let it go" all the time, but it's not exactly that easy. So what exactly are you supposed to do?

Imagine that the conflict is like someone holding on to your wrist. It's very hard to immediately pull away when someone is holding your wrist, you generally need to turn your hand around in some way that becomes uncomfortable for them so that their grip loosens. From there, you can easily pull away.

Most times when we hold on to things it's very much like this. If you can find a way to change your perspective, to alter your angle, you can see things in a new way. And seeing things in this new way allows you to more easily loosen the "grip" of the thing you're clinging to.

Emotions like anger and resentment are difficult to let go of, because we develop the desire to harm others so that we can "get back" at them. But if we can develop a new perspective, one in which we see the person and the situation more clearly, we'll be able to let go of that anger and resentment and find peace.

That’s why I created Healing Through Understanding, a simple compassion meditation. I came up with this form of compassion meditation a long time ago and it's helped me on countless occasions.

Sometimes I call this a compassion meditation exercise, and sometimes the understanding meditation exercise, because that's what compassion, as well as love (and any relationship), is all about: understanding.

At the heart of the Healing Through Understanding compassion meditation lies 2 points:

1. There's a reason behind every action (we all suffer- we all have challenges and difficulties) 2. Everyone is basically good

When it comes down to it, this exercise is really about working with these two points.

Whether it's a friend, loved one, or colleague, the Healing Through Understanding compassion meditation can transform the way you think of another person, help you cultivate compassion and loving-kindness for the person, and in doing so actually help heal the relationship itself as well as the pain you feel in connection with that person.

Let's get into the meditation...

Healing Through Understanding

Think of someone. This could be someone you hate, someone you generally dislike, or simply a friend or loved one whom you’ve only recently had an argument or conflict with.

Whoever they are, sit and meditate on this person. To do this, hold the person in your mind.

This, of course, isn’t possible in a literal sense because you don't know everything about the person (that's the key here), but you’re holding as much of the person you know- your perception of the person (this is what you've done with the person from the beginning, very important to realize this)- within your mind.

Simply be mindful of the various thoughts and feelings that arise while thinking of this person. Don’t judge anything that arises, simply observe it mindfully.

Once you have a decent picture of the person in your mind and you've given it at least a few minutes to develop while observing mindfully, do these three things:

1. See the picture. 

Realize that this very picture in your head, this perception, is what you’re drawing judgment based off of. Not off of the real person, but off of your interpretation of that person.

This is so important, because most of us make the mistake of assuming that what we see is the way it is. But the reality is, most of the time we only see a fragment of what truly is and what we do see is colored by our bias and attitudes.

2. Contemplate the cause. 

Now think of something which that person does or has done which you disapproved of and think of why they might have done or be doing said thing.

If the person said something hurtful to you, start throwing possibilities out there: maybe something is stressing them out and they don’t know how to deal with it, maybe they had a tragedy recently or were hurt and don’t know how to deal with the anger and sadness they’re feeling, or something else.

Whatever it is, start thinking of specific possibilities that could be making them act this way. Think of as many as you can.

3. See clearly.

Lastly, take a step back and review these many possibilities which you’ve brainstormed.

Realize that the reason for their hurtful behavior is two things: 1) not originating from or because of you, and 2) is because they suffer in some way

In other words, from something which they’re experiencing which they don’t know how to deal with.

Once you’ve done this, you’ll see that there’s not just more to the person than meets the eye but that they suffer just like you and I.

To be clear, you don't actually know why they're doing what they're doing. You're simply guessing. But keeping the 2 major points in mind, that we all suffer in some way and that we're all basically good, you know that it's something which exists beneath the surface.

So it's by taking the time to brainstorm what that thing might be which is causing suffering for them and leading them to lash out at others that you're able to let go of the anger and resentment within you and transform it into compassion and understanding.

Conflict usually involves one or more people causing hurt due to being overcome with anger, so if you can realize that the reason this person acted out with anger and aggression wasn’t because of you, but because of something deep within themselves that they’re hurting from, you can learn to cultivate a great amount of compassion for that person as well as alleviate your own feelings of anger and stress.

____________________________

This is a very healing exercise which can be done at any time of day and in any situation. I’m not sure if I use this literally every single day, but it's close to it.

We’re constantly placed into situations where we have to interact with others, even when just driving on the freeway (and boy is it nice to get cut-off by a dangerous driver with my kids in the car!), so this is an exercise you can use literally daily to cultivate compassion, loving-kindness, and a deeper understanding of others.

Healing Through Understanding guided compassion meditation

If you'd like to take the Healing Through Understanding compassion meditation further, I featured it as a guided meditation on the Zen for Everyday Life podcast recently.

You can listen, as well as download the MP3 straight to your computer, here:

Listen to ZfEL #15: Guided Compassion Meditation - Healing Through Understanding

Additional Resources for Exploring Compassion and Loving-Kindness Meditation

Here are a few resources for exploring more conflict resolution, compassion, and loving-kindness meditations and mindfulness techniques:

1. How to Practice Loving-Kindness Meditation
2. How to Overcome Daily Challenges with Loving-Kindness Meditation
3. Love is the Way: The Universal Path to Peace, Happiness, and Enlightenment
4. 3 Ways Intimate Love Keeps Us from Peace and Happiness and How to Transcend Through Self-Love
5. Why Compassionate Acceptance Is Key to a Healthy Mindfulness Practice (and How to Do It)

20 Mindful Eating Tips That Will Transform Your Relationship with Food

Every day, we lose ourselves in the patterns of daily life. Our habit energy pushes and pulls us to and fro and we're left with little opportunity for experiencing life in a way that we're fully present for this very moment.

Some daily activities lend themselves more to this state of autopilot than others. There are some things in our life which we do so often that we become like drones, doing them in a mindless and habitual manner day in and day out. Those activities include walking, driving, certain types of work, as well as eating (among others).

But these activities also lend themselves to mindfulness practice because while these patterns are attractive to the pull of habit energy, they're also the perfect thing to grab onto when we want to become fully present to our lives in any given moment.

Mindfulness is both the quality and the practice of becoming (and staying) fully present to our lives in this very moment. It's mindfulness which allows us to break these habitual patterns and make a change for a more present and wakeful life.

Eating perhaps lends itself to mindfulness practice more than any other activity. This is because we find the flavors we experience when we eat often both interesting and varied and the act of eating enjoyable. And so it's through the simple practice of mindful eating that we can become more awake to our lives and discover greater peace and joy in the process.

We can also, at times, develop bad habits in connection with food and the act of eating. These bad habits, some even considered disorders, can cause us a lot of suffering.

The practice of mindful eating can shine a light on our habitual patterns connected with eating and food itself. And in doing so, we can relieve much of the suffering we experience connected with the food on our plate.

The practice of mindful eating is simple. To eat mindfully, simply:

1. Pause- Take a moment before eating to notice the aroma, visual appeal, and even texture of the food. Savor the various sensations which accompany your meal. This short moment will help your awareness open up so that you become more fully present to the act of eating.
2. Eat mindfully- Be mindful of the lifting of your hand/fork/spoon and the act of chewing the food itself. Pay close attention to each flavor in your mouth and notice how the food feels and smells as you eat it. As your primary point of (light) concentration during mindful eating, be fully present for the act of chewing.
3. Acknowledge thoughts, feelings, and sensations- When thoughts, feelings, or other sensations arise within your field of awareness, simply be mindful of them, acknowledging their presence, and then allow them to pass as if they were floating by on a cloud.
4. Eat mindfully (again)- Then, bring your focus back to the act of chewing. You'll lose your mindfulness constantly in the beginning. Don't worry, this is normal for any form of mindfulness practice. Simply repeat the process from steps 2-4 and attempt to eat mindfully for as much of your meal as possible.

While eating with mindfulness remain open to any thought, feeling, or sensation that comes into your field of awareness and don’t attempt to push them away. Accept whatever arises openly and then bring your focus back.

The practice of mindful eating is simple, but there are many little tips and tricks you can take advantage of to help improve your ability to eat mindfully and to take your mindfulness practice further. Here are 20 mindful eating tips:

20 Mindful Eating Tips That Will Transform Your Relationship with Food

1. Give thanks

Many of us grew up in families (or knew someone who did) who prayed or gave thanks before meals, so this is one you're likely familiar with.

But whether or not you've ever done it yourself, you can take a cue from that and do your own little practice of gratitude at mealtime.

Just take a moment to appreciate the meal in front of you. Cultivate gratitude for it by thinking of the huge amount of work it must have taken to get all of the various ingredients together for you to enjoy this wonderful meal (really, when you think about it, it's pretty astonishing).

This practice isn't just good for your well-being, it helps you center your attention on the meal in front of you, so it's the perfect practice to start each meal off with.

2. Sit down

For some, this may sound obvious and a given. For others, this will be difficult!

Because mindfulness practice is about becoming fully present to our lives in the "now", in this case through the daily activity of eating, it's a bad idea to attempt to eat mindfully while being on the move walking (running?) or driving somewhere. Correction: it's not going to happen (at least successfully).

Part of mindfulness practice is about doing one thing at a time, so do yourself a favor and respect meal time. Sit down, relax, and become present to the meal in front of you.

3. Eat a little more slowly

There is a misconception that you have to do something slowly to do it with mindfulness.

That's not quite true, but it may be necessary at the beginning when you're just getting the hang of mindfulness practice. The reason for this is that to do something slowly helps us focus mentally on the activity at hand.

The more quickly we move the more difficult it is for our mind to keep up with our body, so slowing down is an increased opportunity for mindfulness.

4. Turn off the T.V. & Close your phone (and anything else)

At this point, this one should seem like a natural progression from the first few points.

We're trying to put our complete and undivided attention on the moment that we're eating- both on the act of eating and on whatever arises within that moment of eating- so any electronic devices within eyesight can serve as distractions from our mindfulness practice.

Turn off your T.V., close your phone, turn away or at least sit away from your desktop computer, and away from anything else that could potentially distract you while you're eating.

5. Put down your utensil

This is all about being fully present to each bite that you eat.

The way we usually eat, we take a bite and then immediately begin preparing another bite to eat as we're chewing the original bite. This is a subtle version of multi-tasking, a habit you're trying to undo with mindfulness practice.

What you'll notice very quickly, if you've just begun your mindfulness practice (or even if you've been practicing), is that we don't know how to properly focus on one activity. Some of the ways we multi-task are so subtle they're difficult to detect. Mindfulness practice begins to change that, albeit slowly.

The next time you eat, make it a point to be fully present for the bite in your mouth. Leave your utensil on the table and experience that bite fully with mindfulness.

6. Chew 30 times

In 5 Powerful Ways Mindful Eating Will Transform Your Relationship With Food, I talked about how Zen Buddhist monks and nuns chew each bite of food no less than 30 times:

They do this to help improve their practice of mindful eating, therein emphasizing the act of chewing, the focal point in mindful eating.

The way most of us eat, we chew just a few times and swallow what are still larger pieces. Not only do we throw down our meal quickly and not leave much time to be present or much less rest ourselves in peace and quiet, we're not very kind to our digestive systems.

By chewing each bite at least 30 times, we not only help promote mindfulness practice, but we're kinder to our body and our mind as a result.

When you first practice this it can be difficult to fight the impulse to swallow your food, but with practice, it will become easier. It's definitely worth making the effort.

7. Eat in silence

Aside from chewing each bite 30 times, Zen monastics also eat each meal in silence.

The reason for this is that silence itself, as blank and empty as it might seem when we think about it in our heads, in reality, is very nourishing.

Explaining why is difficult, but any form of activity, even a simple conversation, brings additional activity to the mind. And this activity, when constant and unrelenting as it so often is for us in our everyday lives, perpetuates a greater sense of chaos and confusion (however subtle).

This is OK for a time, but eventually, and regularly, we need a break. Silence allows us to go home to ourselves more easily, which is really what mindfulness allows us to do more than anything else. For this reason, it's the perfect complement to mindfulness practice.

8. Take a moment to breathe

From time to time, you can stop eating and take a moment to become mindful of your breath.

You can either simply be mindful of the quality of your breathing right now or take 3 purposefully deep and mindful breaths. If you're new to mindfulness practice, I'd suggest simply paying attention to the breath as it is.

This simple but powerful mindfulness practice will help recenter your focus as several minutes of doing the same thing can often lead to mindlessness and falling asleep (literally).

9. Switch hands

This might feel a little awkward, but by switching hands, you'll compel yourself to eat with greater mindfulness because of the extra work your brain needs to do to keep up.

This is a really simple mindful eating tip that can help you in the beginning of your mindful eating practice.

10. Be a food critic

This is one of my favorite mindful eating tips on this list and one that can completely put you into the right state of mind in an instant, so it's really helpful.

Act like you're a food critic (whether your meal is fine dining or leftovers) and eat slowly and carefully while paying attention to every little flavor that arises while eating. Pay attention to every little sensation you feel as a result of each individual bite.

Of course, stop short of the damming restaurant review. That won't be very helpful to you in your practice.

There's really nothing more to it than that. That simple state of mind can often be all you need to bring more mindfulness and attentiveness to meal time.

11. Notice certain cues

While eating, certain sensations will arise such as the feeling of hunger, satisfaction, fullness, and sometimes overfullness! Be particularly on the look out for these cues.

By doing this, you make it easier to notice the other things which arise while being mindful and that will further sharpen your mindfulness and concentration.

12. Turn your fork upside down

This is an easy tip which helps keep you present while eating. The idea is as simple as it sounds. There are two ways to eat:

1. Fork pointing up - Scooping motion, no need for accuracy. Laziness possible.
2. Fork pointing down - Stabbing motion, accuracy, and attention necessary. Laziness not possible, for the most part.

That says it all: eating with your fork pointing down, with a stabbing motion to pick up your food, is the way to go (most of the time, at least) as it helps keep you more attentive and present while eating. And that helps your practice of mindful eating.

13. Change your utensil

This is another simple mindful eating tip which helps for much the same reason that switching hands and pointing your fork down helps.

By now you may have noticed that while you can do anything mindfully, mindfulness is improved greatly when we create the right environment for us to concentrate on our point of focus (in the case of mindful eating, that being the act of chewing, tasting, etc.).

The idea is simple: use a different utensil that makes it a bit more difficult to eat. This can be a variety of things, but the easiest and most accessible options would be chopsticks and a smaller spoon/fork.

Personally, chopsticks are very accessible and really help to improve my ability to stay present while eating. And they can be used to eat most things, so I'd suggest trying this out.

Of course, if you grew up using chopsticks this might not be the case for you. So, keep that in mind.

14. Eat food that takes work

This is obviously not something you can always take advantage of, but when possible eat a meal or snack that takes work to eat such as seeded grapes, pistachios, or an orange.

That little bit of work to avoid the seed, break the shell, or peel and separate the orange can not only mix up the act of eating and create more variety but help keep you attentive naturally.

Plus, we're talking about eating more whole foods, which is always a good thing.

15. Have a mindful drink

As I mentioned earlier, some activities are better suited for mindfulness practice than others. Drinking is one of those activities. Particularly something very hot or cold.

You could make a regular practice of drinking a cup of tea or coffee each day mindfully before your breakfast or another meal. This is a highly nourishing practice in itself that also serves to make you more mindful before your meal, so it's a win-win.

You can read how to practice a simple mindfulness tea (or substitute) meditation here.

16. See giver, receiver, and gift

May we with all beings realize the emptiness of the three wheels- giver, receiver, and gift.

Certain Zen practitioners chant the above simple phrase before every meal. The idea is to remind themselves that their meal was a gift and to see the true nature of life itself in the meal. Specifically, the oneness of giver, receiver, and gift.

By repeating this simple phrase, you can perpetuate a subtle shift in the way that you see the world. The shift from giver, receiver, and gift being separate to them being one constantly connected, interrelated, and even same entity.

Like looking deeply into the food that you eat (#18), this point doesn't just enhance mealtime and make it a more nourishing activity, but it helps us bring more mindfulness to the activity at hand by focusing the mind.

17. Cooking the Buddha

As I mention in this and the next point, the practice of mindful eating can extend beyond just the eating of the food. Cooking the Buddha is about cooking and preparing your food mindfully so as to deepen your relationship with the food and emphasize mindfulness.

I originally wrote about this in my book, Zen for Everyday Life:

When you cook or prepare food, as you gather your ingredients, lay them out, cut them up, and put them wherever they need to go (a pot, pan, stove), be mindful of exactly what you’re doing in that very moment. You’re not cooking food to be eaten, you’re simply cooking the food, and you’re doing it with all of your being.

18. Look deeply into your meal

In 5 Powerful Ways Mindful Eating Will Transform Your Relationship With Food, I talked about contemplating on the true nature of the food you're eating:

We can take mindful eating one step further by contemplating on the nature of the food in front of us.

Like taking a magnifying glass to something, contemplating on the true nature of our food is the practice of looking deeply into each individual piece of food on our plate and seeing not only where it comes from but also what it’s made up of.

Looking, or seeing, deeply is a simple exercise made popular by Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh which involves essentially picking an object, particularly a natural object such as a whole fruit, vegetable, or plant, and working backwards to the "origin" of the object and seeing all the countless factors or "ingredients" that allowed that piece of fruit to exist as it is in this moment.

This exercise can really deepen your experience with the food in front of you and turn each meal into a chance to nourish your well-being.

19. Change up what, or where, you eat

Another simple thing you can do is to simply change up what you eat, or where you eat, from time to time.

This is simple, but, changing up anything, from what you have for breakfast from cereal to fresh fruit to eating next to your bedroom window as opposed to your kitchen table, can help compel you to greater mindfulness.

This won't last forever, but often all you need is a little switch up to further promote your mindfulness practice and help make it more of a daily habit.

20. Designate a "mindful snack"

One thing I often talk about for those new to mindfulness practice is designating a single major everyday activity and focusing on that for a week or two (at least). Make it the one and only activity you place any focus on for that time.

The idea there is to develop mindfulness as a daily practice, and it works great in this case as well.

About 2 years ago I did this with watermelon juice. My wife makes incredible watermelon juice, so my sons and I would often request it- especially during the summer- to the point where we drank it every week. I decided that would be my "mindful food/snack" and so I simply focused on being mindful of that with regards to everything I ate and drank and nothing else (aside from my tea in the mornings).

That might sound like a weird thing to do this with, but I enjoyed it so much and the color and fragrance were so strong that when I drank it I'd naturally be compelled to some greater state of mindfulness, so I decided to use that to my advantage.

Preferably, do this with a snack you really enjoy and whose flavor and/or fragrance or visual appeal is strong so that it helps compel you to greater mindfulness. Do this for a week or two and you'll find yourself practicing mindful eating more often throughout each day. This is a powerful strategy and definitely one of my favorite mindful eating tips on this list.

It's Time to Eat (Mindfully)

No matter how you choose to bring the practice of mindful eating into your life, know that it's both highly nourishing and a simple and easy mindfulness practice to start with. And if you've practiced mindfulness for some time but just haven't given it a try yet? It's a powerful practice for bringing more mindfulness into your life.

I hope these 20 mindful eating tips help you not only live with more mindfulness but bring greater peace and happiness into your life as a result.